We have a burger challenge


Photo by unknown

Junior John David Goins prepares to eat the Magnum Burger at the Fillin’ Station Grill.

Story by John David Goins, News Editor

The burger won, and I couldn’t even take another bite.It was such a good burger, with five buns and nine patties stacked high with lettuce, tomato, cheese, fried onions, pickles and my choice of condiment, but I still wasn’t quite up to the challenge.On Aug. 15, I stepped inside the doors of the Fillin’ Station Grill and ordered the Magnum Burger challenge. At first the waitress looked me up and down, wondering where I would pack it all away, but then she hollered to the chefs in the back, “We have a burger challenge.”Excitedly the cook came out to meet me, only to give me the same look. My answer was simple. “I’m a swimmer,” I said, and then I went to take a seat while my burger cooked.

I really wasn’t that hungry, especially since I had eaten at McDonald’s only three hours earlier. As I saw the burger headed my way, I cringed. I still had a look of surprise on my face as the waitress took my picture and started my timer. I began to eat.

The rules were simple: Finish the burger and everything stacked on it in less than 30 minutes. The prize: a T-shirt and a hat. Puking is optional.

“Are you getting full?” onlookers said as I rounded the first 10 minutes, and although I shook my head no, my body told me yes. The chef continued to check on my progress, and at the 15 minute mark, he told me I was doing better than most people.

Realizing I was completely stuffed, people began to become less interested in my eating, and with 8 minutes on the clock, I began to eat very slowly. Finally I was at the 2-minute mark, yet I had only eaten five patties. I set a goal to win even in my failure, and I decided to eat one more patty.

As I took my last bite of that part of the burger, my time ran out and I had to hold my stomach to keep from losing my latest meal. The waitress took my picture, along with the remains of my burger, and hung it up on the wall after writing FAILED across it. It seemed to bring shame to me; it was like I had let all the other swimmers down.

So, I am sending this message out to all big eaters: Eternal glory does not await you after eating this; in fact, all you receive is a lousy T-shirt and a mesh hat. But if you manage to successfully eat the whole thing, then I want to put you in our newspaper, and that, my friend, is worth it.

The Fillin’ Station is a great place to stop for a lunch break or good burger (without having to drive all the way to TLC.)  It located at 5121 Summerhill Rd., where many restaurants have failed to survive, including Shorty’s and Old Tyme Burger Shoppe. For $19.99, you can get the Magnum Burger and see how you stack up. I suggest you try it out. I give it two thumbs up.