No, I don’t eat razorbacks for breakfast

Senior discusses her pork-free lifestyle during Texas vs. Arkansas week.


Rachel Lewis

photo illustration

Story by Naveen Malik, entertainment editor

I heart bacon aprons, “witty” bacon related catch phrases, and literal bacon overtake Texas High during the famed Texas vs. Arkansas week. After 17 years of avoiding bacon at all costs, Texas – Arkansas week is understandably awkward for me.

No, I’m not allergic and I’m not Jewish. I belong to the less socially acceptable religion. Get this— it’s Islam. Yes, that is the same thing as being Muslim for all those confused. I don’t wear a hijab and I believe in wearing Nike shorts on every appropriate occasion.

At times it seems as if my Christian counterparts’ favorite past time is pointing out my hypocrisy in regards to my religion. The thing is, I really just believe in doing what’s right and not eating pork.

I can’t just “pick off the pepperonis,” or “eat it anyway.” I don’t eat pork, not only for religious purposes, but also because I don’t like it. It tastes like soap and butter to me.

I can’t help but feel a little bit uncomfortable about saying “I eat razorbacks for breakfast,” if I generally stick with lowfat yogurt and the occasional strip of turkey bacon. I understand that turkey bacon “just isn’t as good,” but I’m fine with it.

The annual Bacon Fry is filled with awkward comments and peer pressure. It’s as if my refusal to consume bacon renders me spiritless, but listen here, unintentional bullies, I have as much spirit as anyone else.

On orange out day, you will find me dressed in all the orange I own. On apron day, I proudly sport a spirited, but bacon free apron. And on Friday morning at the bacon fry, I’ll be content with a biscuit and eggs.